Experiencing Joy

guest blog by Pastor Matt Waterstone, First Reformed Church of South Holland

Matt Waterstone is senior pastor of First Reformed Church in South Holland, Illinois. He enjoys spending time with his church members who live at Holland Home.

(NOTE: The blog that follows was originally written as a letter from Pastor Matt Waterstone to his congregation. That letter became a weekly letter, which later became a weekly blog. Because of Pastor Matt’s relationship with Providence Life Services, he was not only willing to share this letter on the Providence Life Services blog, he also linked us to updated information about Jeanette Gouwens, the resident highlighted below.)

It was a dreary Monday afternoon, and I had already gotten all of my typical Monday work done. Order of Worship was in good shape; I had memorized Sunday’s Scripture passage and had already tied any loose ends from last week. So, after visiting Cora VanDerBilt at Ingalls Hospital, I made my way over to Holland Home.

I first stopped at the little fellowship hall they have next to the gift shop and had a cup of coffee with Bertha Van Milligan and a dear woman named Edna. We didn’t exchange last names, but she kept inquiring about my marital status.… (Interesting, I thought.) I then took the elevator upstairs and knocked on Jeanette Gouwens’ door. This is where I experienced joy.

Jeanette let me in to her beautiful, warm room. Together we sat for the better part of an hour, talking about church and playing Dutch Bingo. (Her son-in-law works at Western Seminary and actually recruited me to go to Western!) Jeanette’s late husband’s name was Tys (what a great name!), and I made a mental note about that name for future Waterstone boys.

As Jeanette was talking about Tys, her face kind of squinted together, and she said, “O, how we’ve been blessed by God! You can’t imagine how much we’ve been blessed by God, Pastor.” Being the inquisitive young pastor that I am, I asked her to share a few of those blessings.

For starters, she shared that every single one of her kids and grandkids professes Jesus as Lord. Next, she shared that none of her family had been riven by divorce. Finally, she shared that she had been able to be with Tys when he went on to glory. Three profound blessings, shared with obvious joy.

When I read about corrupt political leaders and shaky financial futures, the darkness from the outside starts to get to my insides. I need more times with people like Jeanette to remind me of God’s blessings. I need her example, her encouragement, her testimony.

The more time I spend with Providence residents like Jeannette, the more I am reminded of God’s faithfulness. It’s a genuine joy for me to serve in a setting where I can continually learn from these senior saints!

_____

Pastor Matt shares additional thoughts about Providence residents in two videos on our website — Precious Residents and Living Gems.

8 Tips for Visiting a Loved One

by Melanie Jongsma, Director of Communications

You want to visit Mom, but you know it’s going to be difficult. Her memory isn’t good, and it’s difficult to carry on a conversation. Add to that the guilt you feel — about not wanting to go, about not going often enough, about letting her grow old — and your visit is bound to be an exercise in frustration.

Particularly in a skilled nursing setting, visiting can be difficult. But a little preparation can ease a lot of pressure. Here are some ideas:

1. Ask a family member or pastor to join you. That way you won’t have to be solely responsible to keep the conversation going.
2. Plan your visit during a scheduled activity that you and your loved one can participate in together.
3. Use your time to help with some daily tasks, like opening mail or watering the plants.
4. Before your visit, call a friend or family member who lives out of town and ask questions about what he or she has been doing. Then relay that information to your loved one during your visit.
5. Talk about your children — bring them with if possible! Or talk about kids in your neighborhood or church.
6. Ask for advice — how to fix something, where to plant something, how to deal with a difficult co-worker, where to go on vacation, etc. It’s a great way to make your loved one feel involved and valued.
7. Ask about favorites — food, color, music, restaurant, movie, recipe, season, holiday, animal, day of the week, job, sport, book, etc. Share your own favorites too!
8. Give yourself permission to make it a short visit, less than 30 minutes. It’s not the amount of time that matters; it’s the time itself. You might even feel that you can visit more often if the visits are shorter.

These are just eight ideas to get you started. For more tips — including conversation starters — visit the page on our website: Tips for Visiting a Loved One.